THE NO-FRIEND CLAUSE CHAPT 3

ITS FUNNY I CAN LOOK AT MY OWN LIFE AND MAKE THE COMPARISON OF MANY WHO HAD SO-CALLED FRIENDS BACK IN THE DAY. BUT AS I GOT OLDER I REALIZED THAT THE FEWER PEOPLE IN MY CIRCLE THE BETTER. SOMETIMES WHEN YOU SURROUND YOURSELF BY TOO MANY INDIVIDUALS YOU ARE VERY EASILY PLAYED. AND ITS BEST TO TRY TO AVOID THAT IN MY OPINION. BEING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF IS NEVER FUN WHETHER IT BE IN A FRIENDSHIP OR A RELATIONSHIP FOR THAT MATTER. MOST DO IT BECAUSE OF THEIR OWN INSECURITIES. THEY FEEL THAT THEY ARE BETTER THAN YOU FOR WHAT EVER REASON IF THERE IS IN FACT ONE. WHO KNOWS. BUT THIS IS THE WAY THAT THEY FEEL. AMONG THE PEOPLE THAT I KNEW, I WASN'T THE FIRST TO HAVE KIDS, CERTAINLY WASN'T THE FIRST TO GET MARRIED, AND I WASN'T THE FIRST TO MAKE IT IF THATS THE WORD FOR IT. BUT AT AGE 36, I DID ALL OF THOSE THINGS AND I FEEL LIKE I'M THE LAST MAN STANDING. WHY ? IS THE QUESTION.

I THINK ITS BECAUSE I WENT THROUGH EVERYTHING THAT I WAS SUPPOSE TO GO THROUGH , WHEN I WAS SUPPOSE TO GO THROUGH IT. YES I STRUGGLED, BUT I DID IT AT A TIME BEFORE I WAS MARRIED BEFORE I HAD CHILDREN BEFORE I HAD ANY REAL RESPONSIBILITIES. GOING THROUGH THIS BUILDS CHARACTER , BECAUSE WHEN YOU FINALLY ARRIVE YOU KNOW HOW TO HANDLE THINGS BETTER, YOU KNOW HOW TO BALANCE EVERYTHING IN YOUR LIFE AND MOST IMPORTANTLY YOU KNOW HOW TO REMAIN HUMBLE BECAUSE YOU NEVER WANT TO LOSE THAT. ITS LIKE THAT GUY THAT WE ALL KNOW THAT SEEMS TO HAVE HAD THE EASY ROAD IN LIFE BUT THEN LOSES EVERYTHING BECAUSE THEIR HEAD GOT SO BIG. NEVER THAT!

NEVER LOSE FOCUS ON WHAT YOU WANT TO BE AND MOST IMPORTANTLY NEVER LOSE MEMORY OF WHERE YOU COME FROM. BECAUSE IN THE END YOU'LL FIND YOURSELF BY YOURSELF. YEP

THE NO-FRIEND CLAUSE CHAPT2

TIME CHANGES EVERYTHING DOESN'T. IT CAN HEAL HEARTBREAKS, IT TENDS TO HELP YOU BECOME MUCH MORE WISE AND MUCH MORE MATURE. I THINK WE'VE ALL BEEN THERE. AT AGE 36 I STILL FEEL LIKE I'M LEARNING KNEW THINGS ABOUT LIFE IN GENERAL EVERYDAY. I STILL OF COURSE KEEP THE BASIC FOUNDATION AND THATS KEEP MY CIRCLE SMALL. THATS MEANS LET NO ONE IN, EVEN IF THEY ARE KNOCKING AT THE DOOR. THIS ISN'T ABOUT BEING A JERK , THIS IS ABOUT PROTECTING YOU AND THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT AND LOVE. AND ALTHOUGH THIS IS SOMETHING THAT IN MY OPINION WE SHOULD ALL DO, SOME PEOPLE TEND TO MISTAKE FORGIVENESS AS A SIGN OF WEAKNESS. YOU CAN CERTAINLY FORGIVE THE PEOPLE THAT MISTREAT YOU BUT DO NOT PUT YOURSELF IN THE SAME SITUATION FOR IT TO HAPPEN AGAIN. YOU GOTTA BE SMARTER THAN THAT. THE TRUTH IS YOU MAY THINK THAT YOUR FRIENDS WANT TO SEE YOU HAPPY BUT MOST DO NOT. THEY WANT TO SEE YOU AS MISERABLE AS THEY ARE. IF YOUR MARRIED , THEY DON'T WANT TO GO TO YOUR WEDDING . THEY WANT TO SEE YOU GET A DIVORCE JUST LIKE THEM. SO THAT YOU CAN GET YOUR ALL EXPENSES PAID MEMBERSHIP CARD TO THE MARRIED FOR NO REASON AND DIVORCED FOR EVERY REASON CLUB. IF YOU ARE RASING YOUR KIDS AS A FAMILY THEY DON'T WANT TO SEE THAT, THEY WANT TO SEE YOU HAVE SEVERAL BABY MOTHERS OR FATHERS LIKE THEM. THEY WANT TO HAVE SOMEONE TO SHARE THEIR MISERY WITH.

REMEMBER THAT FRIEND WE ALL KNEW THAT WAS THE FIRST ONE OUT THE GATE TO GET MARRIED. THEY WERE BRAGGING AND TALKING LIKE THEIR LIFE WAS SET. NOTHING COULD STOP THEM. THEY HAD MET THE PERFECT INDIVIDUAL AND NEEDED NO ONE ELSE EVEN IF THAT MEANT YOU! THEY WERE SO EXCITED . 5 YEARS WENT BY AND YOU SAW THEMWITH WIFE OR HUSBAND #3. THEY SKIPPED RIGHT PASS BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND #2. YEAH WE GOTTA DIG DEEPER INTO THIS AS WE EXAMINE HOW WE TREAT THESE INDIVIDUALS WHEN THEY MAKE THAT ATTEMPT TO COME BACK. NEXT CHAPTER PEOPLE

THE NO - FRIEND CLAUSE CHAPT.1

I DECIDED TO WRITE THIS PIECE ABOUT FRIENDS AND WHO ARE THEY TO US REALLY. DO WE REALLY NEED THEM. WELL IN A WAY OF COURSE WE DO. IT FEELS GREAT DOESN'T IT TO HAVE THAT GROUP OF INDIVIDUALS THAT YOU CAN HANG OUT WITH AND TRUST AND JUST HAVE SOME FORM OF RELEASE FROM YOUR EVERYDAY LIFE. BUT DOES THIS EXSIST IN THEORY OR REALITY. I SAY IT CAN EXSIST IN BOTH.

FOR ME I TEND TO KEEP MY CIRCLE SMALL. THE PEOPLE AROUND ME I CONSIDER FAMILY. THE REST I CONSIDER PEOPLE I MAY OR MAY NOT ASSOCIATE WITH. HEY TAKE IT AS IT IS, BUT ITS TRUE. YOU CAN'T TRUST EVERYONE SO WHY PUT YOURSELF IN A POSITION TO FAIL. ITS FUNNY HOW FACEBOOK TIES INTO THIS. THERE ARE INDIVIDUALS THAT REQUEST ME AND SAY HI AS IF WE WERE EVER COOL, ESPECIALLY THE ONES WHO HAVE BURNED ME IN THE PASS. REALITY CHECK. WE'RE NOT COOL. AND I THINK THATS MY POINT. MOST INDIVIDUALS WHO SEEMED TO PLAY THAT ROLE END UP BY THEMSELVES ANYWAYS AND THEN TEND TO TRY TO ASSOCIATE THEMSELVES WITH THE SAME INDIVIDUALS THEY BURNED IN THE FIRST PLACE. THATS WHEN YOU GOTTA HIT THE DELETE BUTTON AND I DON'T MEAN THE ONE ON THE COMPUTER. ITS FUNNY HOW I CAN LOOK BACK THEN AND FAST FORWARD TO NOW. I GOTTA LAUGH I MEAN WHO DIDN'T SEE THIS COMMING. WHEN YOUR FOCUSED AND TRYING TO BETTER YOURSELF YOUR NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR ANYONE, ONCE YOU MAKE IT, YOUR EVERYONES IDOL. I CAN'T COUNT HOW MANY TIMES SOMEONE HAS SAID TO ME WOW YOUR DOING GOOD OR GREAT EVEN AND WOW YOU SEEM TO BE HAPPY. I FIND THAT CRAP HILARIOUS. TO KNOW SOMEONE IS KNOW HOW THEY TICK. AND ONLY MY CIRCLE KNOWS THAT. IF YOU KNEW ME IN THE PASS ITS A REASON I DON'T DEAL WITH YOU NOW. WE BOTH KNOW WHY THAT REASON IS SO WHY EVEN TRY. YOUR ATTEMPT WILL GET KNOCKED DOWN FROM THE JUMP BECAUSE ONCE AGAIN YOU CANNOT TRUST EVERYONE. YOU HAVE TO SEE THAT ATTEMPT AS A PATHETIC CRY FOR HELP FROM SOMEONE WHO THOUGHT THEY WERE BETTER AND ENDED UP LOOKING AT THEMSELVES IN THE MIRROR AND FINDING OUT THAT THEY WERE ABSENT THE DAY THAT BRAINS AND COMMON SENSE WAS HANDED OUT.

I LIKE TO CALL THIS THEORY THE REVERSE SYNDROME. I CAN REMEMBER GUYS I KNEW THAT SOLD DRUGS AND CLAIMED THEY WERE MAKING THOUSANDS OF DOLLARS A NIGHT. NOW I SEE THESE SAME GUYS ON THE BUS STOP AS I'M DRIVING THROUGH. I SEE THE GUYS WHO USED TO HAVE A LEXUS NOW HAVE A GET OUT AND PUSH IT. SOME MAY LOOK AT THIS AND SAY OH LORD HE'S BRAGGING BUT I'M NOT. YOU SEE ALOT OF FRIENDSHIPS AND RELATIONSHIPS UNFORTUNATELY WERE BUILT ON MATERIALISTICS. SOME PEOPLE WOULDN'T EVEN DEAL WITH YOU IF THEY FELT THAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE THE SAME TYPE OF CLOTHES OR CAR. AND SOME PEOPLE WOULDN'T DATE YOU IF THEY FELT THAT YOU COULDN'T SPOIL THEM. AND ONCE AGAIN YOU PRESS THE FAST FORWARD BUTTON AND ITS WEIRD. THATS GOTTA TRULY SUCK FOR THOSE INDIVIDUALS. AS FOR ME I ALWAYS STAY GROUNDED AND THANKFUL. I KNOW THAT ME AND MY FAMILY ARE TRULY BLESSED AND I WOULD NEVER DENY THAT. BUT I'LL NEVER FORGET WHERE I COME FROM. I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT I CAME UP POOR. I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT I TOO AT ONE POINT WAS ON THE BUS STOP. I'LL NEVER FORGET THAT SOME DUMMIES DIDN'T INCLUDE ME IN THEIR PLANS BECAUSE MAYBEY THEY FELT THAT I WASN'T GOOD ENOUGH. AND NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN YOU WANT TO KNOW ME, YOU MISS ME OR SOMETHING. WHAT IN THE BLUE HELL IS THIS! WE GOTTA GET INTO THIS PEOPLE BECAUSE I TRULY THINK THAT EVERYONE AT SOME POINT HAS BEEN A VICTIM OF THIS. STAY TUNE FOR CHAPT 2 LETS GO!

DOES A ONE NIGHT STAND CHANGE YOUR VIEW OF A POSSIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH AN INDIVIDUAL CHAPT 3

when it comes to blogging the thing i hate most about doing it is that sometimes it tends to seem like i generalize individuals. of course its not my intention. the blogs are not meant for that purpose but the truth is this is the time in which we live. life is very different than what of us are acustomed to and i can say that at 36 years old how much its changed since i was younger. sex has become more of a recreational activity than an intimate connection. most people have had more sexual partners than joan collins have been married and thats on dynasty and in reality. its so far fetched to believe that everyone has morals. just because you see a wedding ring on their finger doesn't mean that they are faithful. just because you see someone with their significant other doesn't mean that thats the way they live their life 24/7. now of course there are some people that do the right thing , but unfortunatley there are more that don't than what there are that do.

for instance look at the divorce rate. people aren't getting divorced because someone forgot to get the groceries that day. people are getting marrried to the wrong type of individuals for the wrong reasons and ending up ass out after only a few years. And they are wondering why? truth is they know why. you can't put your feelings and trust into everyone you lay down with. thats the ultimate hell no. you need to be cautious with everyone you meet and everyone you open your heart to. so yes in my opinion a one night stand changes my view on everything. i think that if i engaged in something like that. it would even change my view of me.

thanks everyone for reading my blog, i'm going there in my next blog and mystery. whose baby is it? comming up next!

DOES A ONE NIGHT STAND CHANGE YOUR VIEW OF A POSSIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH AN INDIVIDUAL CHAPT 2

FIRST OFF WE MUST DEFINE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEX AND LOVE. JUST BECAUSE YOU FUCK SOMEONE DOESN'T MEAN THAT THEY LOVE YOU OR THAT YOU LOVE THEM. ALOT OF MEN AND WOMEN FALL FOR THIS. SEX IS JUST WHAT IT IS. ITS SEX. YOU GET NAKED FUCK FOR A FEW ROUNDS CLIMAX TO THE FULLEST AND WHEN ITS DONE AND HOPEFULLY IT WAS GOOD, IT ENDS THERE. THERE ARE NO FEELINGS INVOLVED DURING THESE ONE NIGHT STANDS. ITS JUST THE ALCOHOL AND THE FACT THAT MAYBEY YOU'VE BEEN HORNY FOR THE PAST FEW MONTHS. AND IT AMAZES ME HOW WOMEN TEND TO ACT LIKE ONLY MEN FEEL THIS WAY AND PLAY THIS GAME. PUMP YOUR BREAKS. WOMEN DO THE SAME THING. THEY ARE QUICK TO FUCK YOU AND AFTERWARDS GO HOME TO THEIR BABY'S FATHER. THATS WHAT THEY DO. NOW NOT ALL MEN AND WOMEN ARE THIS WAY OBVIOUSLY BUT THERE ARE ENOUGH OF THEM THAT ARE FOR MY STATEMNT OF FACTS TO BE TRUE. YOU SEE WHEN YOUR IN A RELATIONSHIP, YOU REALLY DON'T GAIN ALOT OF EXPERIENCE FROM THAT. THERE ARE SO MANY MEN AND WOMEN THAT HAVE BEEN IN NOTHING BUT RELATIONSHIPS. THATS NOT EXPERIENCE. THATS LIKE DRIVING IN ONE LANE. NOW WHERE EXPERIENCE COMES INTO PLAY IS DATING. WHEN YOU DATE YOU GET A CHANCE TO WEIGH YOUR OPTIONS TO FIND YOUR LIKES AND DISLIKES AND TO ALMOST BUILD THE TYPE OF PARTNER THAT YOU WANT IN YOUR LIFE. NOW ALL YOU HAVE TO DO IS FIND THAT INDIVIDUAL THAT HAS THOSE QUALITIES THAT YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO. YOU CAN'T FIND THIS IN BEING IN A RELATIONSHIP. DATING IS THE BEST WAY. IT GIVES YOU THE OPPORTUNITY TO STAND BACK AND OBSERVE WITHOUT GOING ALL IN AND THROWING YOUR HEART OUT THERE. THEN YOU CAN TAKE THAT CHANCE. ITS THERE IN THE DATING SCENE THAT YOU WILL FIND THAT YES MOST MEN ARE FULL OF SHIT BUT ALSO MOST WOMEN ARE TOO. IS IT FAIR HELL NO! BUT STILL IT IS TRUE. AND YOU CAN'T CONFUSE THIS THEORY WITH A GOOD ONE NIGHT STAND OF SEX. SEX IS ALL PHYSICAL THATS IT. NOW ONCE YOU'VE GAINED AN INTEREST IN SOMEONE NOW THATS A COMPLETELY DIFFERENT BALL GAME. SO I ASK YOU AGAIN CAN YOU REALLY HAVE A FUTURE WITH SOMEONE THAT YOU'VE HAD A ONE NIGHT STAND WITH. DON'T GET IT TWISTED YOUR NOT THE ONLY ONE THEY FUCKED THAT QUICK. TRUST ME ON THAT. NEXT CHAPTER

DOES A ONE NIGHT STAND CHNAGE YOUR VIEW OF A POSSIBLE RELATIONSHIP WITH AN INDIVIDUAL CHAPT 1

OK SO I WAS LISTENING TO ONE OF MY FAVORITE SHOWS ON SIRUS RADIO. ITS CALLED COCKTAILS WITH PATRICK AND THEY BROUGHT UP AN INTERESTING TOPIC. AND I REALLY HAD TO THINK BACK ON THIS WONDERING IF A ONE NIGHT STAND CHANGED MY PERCEPTION OF A PERSON. AND I GOTTA SAY IT DID AND IT DIDN'T. I WAS ON BOTH SIDES OF THE FENCE ON THIS ONE BECAUSE BACK WHEN I WAS SINGLE IT WASN'T LIKE SEX WAS JUST KNOCKING AT THE DOOR OR ANYTHING. I MEAN LETS BE HONEST. WE ALL HAVE THOSE DAYS WHERE WE ARE EXTREMELY HORNY. AND I MEAN THATS WHAT A ONE NIGHT STAND CAN DO FOR YOU. NOW IT ALSO DEPENDS ON THE PERSON THAT YOUR HAVING THE ONE NIGHT STAND WITH. IF YOUR FALLING FOR A PERSON THAT YOU ARE DATING YOU GOTTA HOLD BACK ON THE SEX A BIT. THATS RIGHT FELLAS IF YOU HAVE BLUE BALLS, A FEW MORE WEEKS OR MONTHS WON'T MAKE THAT MUCH OF A DIFFERENCE NOW WILL IT. I THINK IT CAN BE REALLY DIFFICULT TO HAVE A ONE NIGHT STAND WITH SOMEONE AND CONSIDER THEM A POTENTIAL BOY/GIRL FRIEND. BUT THEN THEY COULD BE THINKING THE SAME THING ABOUT YOU AS WELL. I THINK IT SORT OF GOES ALONG WITH THAT WHOLE THEORY SOMETIMES SEX IS JUST SEX AND YOU SHOULD LEAVE IT AT THAT. NOW HOPEFULLY THE SEX IS GOOD SEX. BUT STILL THATS ALL IT WAS. BOTH MEN AND WOMEN HAVE HAD CERTAIN INSTANCES WHERE THATS ALL IT WAS TO THEM. YOU WENT IN, FUCKED YOUR BRAINS OUT AND AT THE END OF THE NIGHT THERE WASN'T MUCH LEFT TO SAY. BUT TO LOOK AT THAT PERSON AND SAY HEY I THINK I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU, SCARES THE HELL OUT OF ME.

I THINK SO MANY PEOPLE CONFUSE THE TWO AND I MYSELF HAVE DONE THIS IN THE PAST. SOMETIMES YOU DATE A PERSON AND YOUR PHYSICALLY ATTRACTED TO THEM AND YOU CAN JUST IMAGINE THEM NAKED EVEN IF THEIR STANDING IN FRONT OF YOU WITH A SKI SUIT ON READY TO HIT THE SLOPES. AND ONCE YOU HAVE SEX WITH THEM IT SORT OF RUINS THE MOMENT FOR ANYTHING THAT COULD POSSIBLY GO FURTHER. AND IN THE BACK OF YOUR MIND YOUR THINKING WOW THAT SEX WAS GREAT! BUT I WONDER IF I WAS THE ONLY PERSON THEY HAS SEX WITH THAT QUICK. WELL ODDS ARE YOU AREN'T AND NEXT CHAPTER WE WILL DIG INTO WHY.

REAL MEN WHERE PANTS THAT FIT chapt 4

one of the major problems with men in general is that they refuse to change their ways. some feel they will never work a 9 to 5 job. some feel that they are gonna purchase the highest fashion and drive the most expensive car even if they can't afford it. others are even more dumb founded. they believe sending 20 bucks and a pack fo pampers is rasing a child and they wonder why their asses is getting hit up for child support.

this is a major problem. but knowing that is does exsist, why not break the cycle. why not after you see that miracle of your son or daughter being born, be a father to your children. raise your kids. they need us men in their lives. now more than ever. if your pockets can't afford something don't buy it. downsize if possible to live more comfortable. remember nice clothes don't pay the bills.

also treat women with respect. yes i agree that there are very few good women out here but that doesn't mean that you have to stero-type them all and treat them like their name was bertha. women deserve better than that. everything is a risk. and somethings are risks worth taking.

i wanna show love to all the real men that are wearing the pants that fit them. assuming the roles that they have to play as fathers husbands, and in the work force. its so few of us so we gotta keep it going for the idiots that haven't gotten a clue yet.

ok thanks for reading my blogs stay tune for my next mystery. comming up next entitled. the unfaithful faithful.